Pure Relationships
From “Letter to My Young Friend.”
After you read the words below, you might be tempted to say “Hey!! That was about dating! I hate it when he talks about that!” I promise you, it is not about dating. As a matter of fact, let’s take the act of dating out of the picture completely. Instead, let’s talk about pure relationships.After you get married, there are certain rules that you need to apply to your relationships if you want to STAY married. You may not agree with all the rules, but believe me, if you break them, you’ll be asking for trouble.
- As much as you can possibly avoid it, don’t be alone with a member of the opposite sex that you are not related to.
- Don’t hold hands with a member of the opposite sex that you are not related to.
- Don’t kiss a member of the opposite sex that you are not related to.
- Don’t have sex with someone who is not your spouse.
Can we agree that these are good rules? I don’t think they’re that difficult or abstract. I’ve been married for nineteen years and have followed them. (OK, except for the holding hands thing. What is it with those kumbaya moments at church? Is it a rule that we have to hold hands? No offense, but I don’t want to hold hands with anyone I’m not related to.)
Bottom line: when you are married, you are not allowed to do anything on the list above with someone who is not your wife.
So, what about the girl you are hanging out with right now? Is it OK to do all the things on the list with her? Again, walk with me here… Is she your wife? No, she isn’t. So, if after you get married you are not allowed to break these rules, why is it OK to break them BEFORE you get married? Do you honestly think that, just because you’re married, you’ll suddenly be chaste and save yourself only for your wife?
I’m not saying you can’t date – really. Maybe we just need to redefine dating/relationships. Is it possible to really get to know her and still apply all the rules listed above? Yes, it is. When you finally get married, which would you rather tell your wife: “Don’t worry, I’ve been practicing!!” or “I’ve been saving myself for you.”?
Can you imagine what it would be like if your wife said that to you?
It’s going to be difficult, but you can do it.
More to follow…
Right on Bro!!!
Ooohhh..you are going to step on some toes here…be careful!